Page 1 Page 2 Page 3 Page 4 Page 5 Page 6 Page 7 Page 8 Page 9 Page 10 Page 11 Page 12 Page 13 Page 14 Page 15 Page 16 Page 17 Page 18 Page 19 Page 20 Page 21 Page 22 Page 23 Page 24 Page 25 Page 26 Page 27 Page 28 Page 29 Page 30 Page 31 Page 32 Page 33 Page 34 Page 35 Page 36 Page 37 Page 38 Page 39 Page 40 Page 41 Page 42 Page 43 Page 44 Page 45 Page 46 Page 47 Page 4812 Helping Young People Cope and Heal CREATING A SPACE FOR HEALING Listen without judgment When young people are grieving, adults can be quick to offer them advice, give opinions, and make judgments. Listen without judging, interpreting, or evaluating. With young children especially, sometimes the best response is to simply repeat what they’ve said so they know they’ve been heard (e.g., “You really miss your mom, especially when you wake up in the morning”). Once children or teens trust that you will listen and be understanding, they’ll be more likely to come to you when they’re hurting or in need of advice. If they’re not ready to talk about what they’re experiencing, reassure them that you are available to them whenever they do want to talk. Many children worry that asking questions will upset the adult. Reassure them that it’s okay to ask any questions they might have, even if it might be emotional for you. Provide routines and consistency Life is often in upheaval after a death. Try to find ways to create safety and predictability for the child so they know what to expect. Consider creating routines around bedtime, after-school activities (e.g., “Homework is done by 7 p.m.”), or meals. Do allow for some flexibility, however, so that children can trust that, if they need a break from a given routine, their world will be responsive (e.g., “You can take a break from homework now and come back to it later”). For teenagers, routines and boundaries can provide a sense of safety and security during uncertain times. They may test and fight such boundaries, but ultimately most find comfort in knowing someone is paying attention to their lives and looking out for them.