Blog: Finding Hope While Supporting Friends in Crisis

Blog by Adam Pratt, Intern for the Greater San Francisco Bay Area Chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

Having a loved one talk to you about their struggles with suicide can be an unnerving experience. I found this out in my late teens when two of my closest friends opened up about their struggles with suicidal thoughts. One of my friends reached out after the worst of his struggles had passed as a sort of acknowledgement of what he had gone through. At that point, he was safe and had the resources he needed. However, I was unsettled by the fact that I had no idea how much he was hurting. I saw him every day at school yet was completely blind to his struggles until he told me. My other friend scared me in a much more visceral way as I ended up being the person to help him through his crisis. In what remains as one of the important nights of my life I had spontaneously stopped by his house only to find him in a moment of real crisis. I stayed there for the rest of the night to talk with him, listen, make sure he was safe, and mostly just to be there with him. 

That night remains hazy in my memory, but I am sure I didn’t do everything right. I didn’t say the right things or find the right resources. I remember asking him openly about suicide and working out a plan to remove any accessible lethal means. However, that was simply what my gut told me to do. I was scared because I did not know what to do, how to talk to him, or who to reach out to for help. He eventually got the help he needed and has been doing well ever since.   

Yet, after that night I was left rattled by my lack of knowledge of what to do and how to help those closest to me. For one of my friends, I never noticed the warning signs for his struggles and for my other friend, I didn’t know how to best help him in his time of need. This led me to learn more about suicide prevention and eventually work with the AFSP. I wanted to know how to help not only those I loved but anyone struggling with suicide. I am not a mental health professional; I am a public health graduate student. I don’t have the intention to work in one-on-one suicide prevention, however the night that I helped my friend in crisis shows the importance for suicide prevention training to be accessible for everyone. I did not go to his house that night expecting to provide crisis support, but it happened anyway. Getting certified in CPR does not mean that you will become a first responder; its knowledge and practice made available for worst-case scenarios. Just like CPR, you hope to never be in a situation where you must use suicide prevention skills but having that knowledge there when needed can be lifesaving. 

As an intern with the Greater San Francisco Bay Area Chapter of the AFSP, working within program operations has been the most impactful part of my work. I know how important it is to be able to offer accessible training like Talk Saves Lives and Its Real: Teens and Mental Health to a variety of communities. I find joy and purpose in being able to share knowledge that my past self would have wanted and training others to help their loved ones should they ever find themselves in a similar situation as my own.  

Not everyone will struggle with suicide in their lives. Not everyone will find themselves in crisis support situations. However, if we want to live in a world where none of our loved ones are lost to suicide, then it starts with ensuring everyone is equipped with lifesaving skills should they need them.